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Sunday, April 6, 2014

My Apology To You

I know, I've been gone two weeks.  Not an eternity, of course, but long enough that I feel I should apologize, and to also let you know I intend to take some time off from blogging; possibly forever.

Last week, I could not get anyone to take my picture.  This week, my husband was home.  He injured his back pretty badly, and I have been here at home trying to take care of him, the house, and our kids, while working full time.   I woke up, got ready, and wore a new item I had purchased in my new size 14/16.  I was pretty jazzed about it.  When I asked him to please take my picture, he snorted and said, "Another photo for your vanity collection?"

I know lots of people take their own pictures.  I could probably do that, but the idea of buying a new camera and learning how to set it up...I'm just not interested.  One would think that, after cleaning, laundry, cooking, caring for pets that some people swore "Mooooom, I promise I'll feed/walk/scoop litter/give baths/play with XXXXX" that simply asking for someone to take less than five minutes of their day to take a stupid picture of me once a week would not be a stretch.  But apparently, I have crossed the line with my family.  I never thought I was being arrogant, or vain, but I guess that's what they think of me.  It floored me.  In church today, while the pastor preached a great sermon, all I could think was that I have embarrassed and shamed my family.  And that I was being horribly sinful by caring what I looked like.

When I got home from church, I put all the nail polish stuff in my daughter's room.  I kept out all the hair ties and barrettes because my own husband has longer hair than I do.  I put all the make up under the sink, so Missy can go through it when she comes home and see what she wants to keep.  I plan on throwing away the rest.  I hung up the beautiful dress which I loved and paid top dollar for.   I asked my best friend if she wanted my necklaces, and I'll probably donate the earrings since everyone I know is allergic to cheap earrings.  I had planned on coloring my hair tonight, but I put the hair dye boxes under the sink.  Why bother?  I'm going gray.  I guess I'll start going gray, gracefully.

I still intend to keep working out, and continue my weight loss journey.  But I won't be buying new dresses anymore when I hit a milestone.  Right now, the only things I intend to buy are new running shoes, a sports bra, and maybe a few more pairs of work out pants.

All these years, when I have dressed up, did my nails and make up, colored my hair, shaved my legs, waxed my eyebrows, and put an effort into my look, it was about me, but it was more about honoring my husband...or so I thought.  He teased me for years, and I truly always thought it was teasing.  I didn't know he meant it...that he thought I was stuck up and vain.  It's like an arrow through my heart.   And honestly, I don't know how I can bother working on my look anymore when  my husband was disgusted by it.  And I can't bear the thought of posting pics of myself wearing tee shirts and work out pants, so right now, I don't know the direction I can go with this blog.  Except to stop.

It was truly wonderful "meeting" all of you.  I think the internet is a great place to learn new things, meet new people, discover new ideas and customs, and I will always thank God above for letting me know about you, and for sharing my life with you.  But for now, that time is over.  I have nothing to share.    So I bid all of you this apology, and also my heartfelt thanks for letting me into your lives.  I wish all of you nothing but blessings, love, and peace.  Perhaps I will stop by every now and then to give an update on my weight loss and family milestones, but there won't be any more outfit postings.

My Bible verse this week comes from Ecclesiastes 1:15-18.

15 What is crooked cannot be straightened;
    what is lacking cannot be counted.
16 I said to myself, “Look, I have increased in wisdom more than anyone who has ruled over Jerusalem before me; I have experienced much of wisdom and knowledge.” 17 Then I applied myself to the understanding of wisdom, and also of madness and folly, but I learned that this, too, is a chasing after the wind.
18 For with much wisdom comes much sorrow;
    the more knowledge, the more grief.

Sunday, March 23, 2014

Why, Yes. I *Do* Like Purple. How Could You Tell?

Another awesome day at church, another cute outfit.  Today's outfit I only purchased yesterday at Goodwill for $6.99.  I imagine it could be a dress (as I wore it) or a skirt since the top part is that stretchy material.  A great basic pieces that I will wear all summer.  I do love me some purple!

Goodwill dress/skirt thingy, $6.99.  Merona shrug, size 1x...no idea when I got it or how old it is.  I was digging through old clothes and found it yesterday.  And my Aerosoles flip flops.

I tried hot rollers today for the first time.  It didn't go over very well.  I bought one set of ten rollers.  I watched quite a few tutorials on youtube over the weekend, and I learned something very important about myself.  Whatever a website says to do once, I really need to do twice.  My hair is insanely thick.  I have been treating my hair like a white girl (because, duh, I am white) but as a woman of Jewish descent, I should be treating it more...well, ethnically, I guess.  So I'm going to buy another set of rollers because I only got half of my head done with the one set, which is why I look kind of lopsided here.

By the way...I am now down TWENTY TWO POUNDS.  Yeah, you heard me.  Twenty two pounds!  I took pictures of some of my dresses over the weekend and have them for sale on craigslist.  That's 13 dresses for sale.  My side of the closet looks very empty these days.

I am feeling great, exercising, eating well, and I'm about to add Kettleworx to my routine.  Yes!  What this girl needs is some muscle definition and less couch potato practice.  

Monday, March 17, 2014

Irish Eyes Smile, But Mine Sparkle!

Guys!!!  Happy Monday to you all.  I still have no info on whether I got the new job or not.  Nevertheless, I try to keep up my spirits by wearing an adorable new dress in an adorable new size (18, and I bought it a month ago and now it's too big already) with an adorable smile on my face.

Smirk.  I feel awesome.  New green dress, purchased from Ross in February 2014 for less than $20.  The shoes are from Ross too, I bought them last year when I was recuperating from my miscarriage  

It's a "high-low" hem which I'm still not sure about, but I'm pretty sure I won't be a size 18 much longer so who cares?

I wish my husband had seen me in this dress...

Nothing else to really talk about here.  Have a great week!